Can I help you?

Whenever I go shopping, regardless of what I want to buy, I prefer going to the store, hunting down my objective and getting out as quickly as possible. Today however, I was entertaining homicidal thoughts (imaginary, not real for those of you ready to dial 911). It was a nice sunny Sunday afternoon, so after a long and very delicious brunch I wanted to do some investigative furniture shopping. I wasn't 10 feet in the store when this tall, thin and lanky sales woman almost tackled me in the foyer. "Hello, my name is Carol. Is there anything I can help you with?" Yup, I thought, a little breathing space would be nice. Her quick approach made me think that she was working on commission. So, as politely as I could, I let her know that my being there was just to look around and to get some ideas. Should I need her help I would come and get her.

Less than five minutes later, I was looking at some accessory's hanging on a wall and was just lifting the tag to scope out the price of something. Next voice I hear is Carols, who managed to sneak up behind me, telling me that they have a great collection of blah, blah, blah! Smiling politely, but thinking otherwise, I acknowledged her comment with a curt nod. She reminded me that her name was Carol and if I needed any help wah, wah, wah! She acted like some addict looking for her next fix. It was getting positively freaky!

The way this store was laid out was kind of interesting. It was like moving from one honeycomb to another. Except now, I was on the lookout for the Queen Bee. I began to peek into the next show room as a precaution in the hopes of eluding Ms. Carol. I would kind of give it a quick scan, rotating my body as I checked my flank to ensure there was no repeat attack from the rear. I moved cautiously now as I got closer to the exit and freedom. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her in the distance and felt a momentary relief. One room to go. Nice stuff I thought, may have to come back....whoa! What was I thinking! I turned to leave and there standing in the foyer by the door was, you guessed it, Ms. Carol. "Didn't see anything you like?", she asked. In my head I responded, "Yup...the door". I just shook my head no, and sidled out the door into the sunshine and freedom.

Like seriously! I know they are trying to make a living and more power to them. But for the love of God, can people not just walk about at their own leisure without being stalked like prey by some big game hunter. Do they not understand that we are quite capable of looking and touching and capturing ideas without help. Believe me, if I wanted to ask any questions, I would have been quite prepared to ask them. Have you run into similar situations whereby you are just in a browsing mood but are constantly ambushed by a team of sales guerrillas? How do you deal with them and are your methods legal?